Gentle reminder.

Dear little niece,

You are now a few months shy from turning a year old. You can't read yet (rest assured, I will be expecting for you to be able to in a few years time), neither will you ever be aware of the existence of this entry. 

Nevertheless, this is for you. Perhaps for my future children as well, should I be blessed to have any. (God, I swear I'll do my best to be a good mother, and I'll make sure they'll have a good father)

Ayra,

When you learn to talk, you will start to ask questions. "Why is the sky blue?" is a pretty generic question for a kid to ask. Though it is never wrong to ask such questions (if you're honest in knowing the answer), know that I will always appreciate a curious mind (we share the same gene pool, after all) so do not ever be afraid to ask something out of the norm. The more peculiar, the better. Don't be discouraged if your questions are met with blank stares by your teachers at school, because I'm here, and 'here' is where I will always be for you.

She 'has' my nose!

By now you would have known my Achilles' heel that is I am weak at a child's request. So I wish so hard that you wouldn't turn out to be a brat, because if you do, I'd have myself to blame. FYI, you're doing wonderful so far! You hardly cry and your smile.. Oh, your smile. It's more than a good enough reason for your father to sing to you that Bruno Mars song every time he could.

Father - daughter

Notice the man I'm always with? He sings to me the same song as well. And would literally stop moving, no matter where we are when I smile - he did just that at KLCC's center court in front of everyone! 

... Ayra, beware of such men!

(Heh heh.)

My darling niece,

When you start going to school, you'd realise that there are a lot of other kids with sleakier hair or pretty curly bouncy Goldilocks hair (that ho!), sharp sculpted nose or cuter button-shaped nose, lips as red as ruby, skin as fair as Snow White - these are what general society wants you to believe is actual beauty. Believe me when I say you are beautiful, I am not lying. By now you should also know that this aunt of yours do not condone false flatteries. 

The only way for someone to truly be ugly is when their insides are.

After all, 

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely. (Roald Dahl)

Try as I might to assure you, my dear, one day you may wish for yourself to look different, as did I when I was younger. 

I thought my lips were too thick as opposed to the thin-lipped beauties that were famous during that time. Thought my eyes were too small. Wished for a smaller nose, bigger boobs (can I say this?), but really it's just a matter of time before you will eventually grow into yourself. B-cup or C-cup, I am now constantly harassed by numerous admirers praising my unbelievable beaut- OK OK I'M KIDDING!

(note: Ayra Schmayra, know when to appropriately loosen things up a little)

(was that appropriate?)

Sure, I have my Unpretty-Days and I could most definitely do with some exercise (beware of food in JB, Ayra!) but I'm okay. You will be too - only if you weren't in the first place.

You may not be beautiful to everyone, but to those that appreciate you for who you truly are, are really the ones worth noting.

Also,

When you grow older, I will help you with make up (prepare to look like Krusty).

Ayra dearest,

When you start going to school, you'd start making friends. Choose your friends wisely. Keep the ones who knows how much you mean to them and are willing to do the same things you are willing to do for them. 

Though things are not going to be fine and dandy forever, don't be bitter. Be grateful for that amount of time when it was.

Ayra Nabilah,

As you grow even older, you'd start to notice boys. Now please excuse me, I need to flex my fingers. 

.

..

...

Ayra sayang, that boy you think you 'love' in school may or may not be the man you'll eventually marry, so please, honey-

Don't flood your social network's profile pictures with his, because it's your account. This also means no joined account too.

Please don't intentionally wear the same shade (or worse, the same fabric) of baju kurung / baju melayu for Raya celebration.

DO NOT salam his hand and kiss it everytime you part, save that special practice for your future husband.

Be wary when answering a man's proposal for marriage. In other words, don't answer.

The Love of My Life is a title one should only award to their true love. Trust me when I tell you not to declare that when you are only 17 (or 23, unless you're married to said Love of Your Life - with that said, please don't get married at 23).

Lastly, don't let your mouth say what your heart does not feel. And when your heart does feel it, please don't leave brain out of it.

Love can be many wonderful things but it will hurt, one way or another. 

If you've tried your best, don't be heartbroken if it doesn't work out. Just.. Love anyway. Because one day you will meet someone who will make you see why it never happened with anyone else.

Wallahi ya Ayra, Chik Cha promise you, it will all be worth it. I believe that if you put your trust in God, you put your trust in His plans as well.

If you do defy everything I've specifically told you not to, know that I'd still be here for you when things go wrong. But of course - nag first, hug later, and must listen forever.

Ok? DEAL.

Sleeping with Paknek

My precious gem, the apple of my eye,

I could wish for so many things, but what I wish most is for you to stay true to yourself. Learn from your mistakes. Stand by your principles. Be modest, be humble, be fair. Be very kind. Be courteous. Know that age does not guarantee wisdom. Respect is to be earned. Honesty is always the best policy. A gentleman will always win over any handsome man. Left lane moves faster than right lane during peak hours. Do not jump queues. Everybody lies, do not be disheartened. If a guy rejects you, walk away. If a friend refuses to be your friend anymore, let it go. Ego is not necessarily a bad thing. Just because it's mainstream, doesn't mean it's lousy. Pout is okay but not in every picture. There are wants and there are needs. Brain >>>> beauty. And for the love of that plush toy you sleep with every night, read.

Love only until eternity,

Chik Cha

Gong xi, gong xi.

My work desk....

.. Which has nothing to do with what I wanted to write about. Well, maybe a little. 

Life has been wonderful.

Work is great (the only thing related to the picture!). Family is waaay better than amazing - my dear brother is getting engaged soon. And not forgetting another little addition to our family this year. You bet your cow, my mom is ecstatic. Friends seem to be contented. Quite a number of them are going to tie the knot soon! I may have to start shopping for new baju kurung for all the majlis this year.


And when everyone is happy, I can't help but to feel so beamingly happy too. :-)

You should know that I am currently attempting to kick the habit of 'melatah'. The 'melatah' part isn't really a problem, it's what I blurt out is! I always have to apologise everytime I latah - even when my latah is right after I tripped over something and rubberneckers just wanted to laugh but I feel so guilty... So I've been trying to say Kicap instead of.. well. You know. Wish me luck! And you know I need at least 5 bags full of it. So get cracking! Luck! Wish me. NOW.


Heh heh.

This was supposed to only be a filler post. But as per usual..... Awh, typical Aysha!

I am currently in Kemaman at a future new family's house for some bonding. This trip is going to be interesting. I first came here 2 years ago for a fieldwork. Been trying to remember what we did here but find myself confusing our time in Mersing and Kemaman every time. Definitely a geologically challenged Geology graduate! And then there's that memory at Tanjung Gemok.... Which reminds me of the wedding presentation we wanted to make for one of our friends - we were talking about including the extremely hilarious series of photos we took together and  present it to the guests on her wedding day! Kalau laki masih sayang, memang cinta sejati lah!

And that got to one of them talking about the video of me at Tanjung Gemok and him wanting to make the same thing! I shudder at the thought of the video still existing somewhere.. Kalau masih sayang aku lepas tengok video tu, memang maha agung lah cinta, aku berjanji sumpah setia sampai mati! Boys and girls, it is thaaaat embarrassing.

Anyway, many things have not quite sunk in yet. I still write 2011 in my notebook instead of 2012. I am still questioning many things. Still in disbelief, if I have to be honest. But in a good way. I'm happy. And thankful. And grateful. And I gotta feeling that this year is going to be fracking ace. 


So.. Amin to that?

P.s. Kawan kawan, what happens during fieldwork, STAYS between us!

Good to be back.

Darling niece being such a darling.

Back to our usual routine of lots and lots of walking (which I don't do anywhere else).
Someone please tell him how lucky he is that he could get me to do all this?

Jack and I, reunited.

In the office (kantoi suka pusing-pusing kat kerusi).

Two more things to look forward to for December! Ah, happy is moi. : )

56.

This is a story about my father.

My father is a very quiet man - when he says okay on that piece of clothing you picked up from the rack, you better make your move fast to the counter and seal your purchase. When he's silent, you better start reasoning your choice - why do you need a car when you can take the bus, why do you have to go to that picnic with your friends, why this, why that. When he says no, you don't negotiate, you just quietly retreat to your room. 

His way of showing his love (and he prefers to not show it at all) is through his actions. Once I was sneezing non-stop due to a sudden heightened sensitivity towards cat fur and he secretly left Panadol tablets and cough medicine on my traveling bag - as I had to leave for Bintulu the day after. On my way home from the office that one day about to embark on my usual two hour journey, I spoke to my mother on the phone and our line was cut off mid-conversation. I thought nothing of it until I realised it was my phone's fault and after an hour without coverage, I switched it off and back on again. The moment signal was restored I received a phone call from my sister telling me in frantic that my father was already on his way to Bintulu to look for me halfway. And that one time when I received the good news for my interview in KL whilst driving back to Miri from Bintulu, I immediately called him and instead of congratulating me I was cut off short, "Drive dolok, kelak cerita." Click. 

When I achieve something proud-worthy to him (and I rarely do) instead of hugging me to congratulate, it was always, "Bapak tumpang sekaki ajak."

When I ask for something, when I do achieve something (anything), he won't say another word and just.. sign on my heart's desire. A car, a new laptop, a mobile phone, a watch, the hard cover book when I could just settle for paperback.. 

My father is a man of a number of rules. No hair-dying. No nail-colouring. No more-than-two piercings. No going out after Maghrib. No sleeveles tops. No laughing too loudly (oops?). And back when I was still in secondary school, no going out with friends every weekend (only once a month). No drinking (duh!). No smoking. No clubbing. 

When I was younger, I used to wish he'd love me less. Because for every rules that he set, my other siblings were able to limbo pass it with no qualms! No hair-dying, and you see my sister with light brown hair or bleached streak on her bangs (which I also worked but for only a week because my father threatened to shave my hair when I sleep). No more-than-two piercings, and you have my sister sporting more than two and at various locations and my baby sister currently with four on her lobes when I had to hide mine (when I had four!) like it was the biggest sin one could ever commit. I was 21 and still my father would call me at 5 (and I was in KL!) and insisted that I make my move back to the dorm before Maghrib. As for the last three rules? I turned out okay. I don't drink, neither do I smoke or go to clubs.

Of course, I am not perfect and I never was. 

To read the third paragraph of this entry and think that I used to wish he'd love me less? 

You know he's angry when he's quiet. You know he's furious when he speaks out.

Throughout my 23 years of living, he has only ever scolded me once. It was for something I did not do and it was so bad, I sobbed in front of my friends without hiding and later that night, to sleep. 

Once, I felt so depressed and possibly at my lowest state, with my heart so heavy, I walked to his room and told him about it. There you have me crying the living hell out of myself, and there you have him, steady - in his Baju Melayu after coming back from the mosque, his reading glasses perched on his nose, his face unyielding any emotions and he asked, "So, what are you going to do?"

That was my own fault.

Once, I was broken hearted for a boy, who was not even worth a second of my lifetime and I fell sick for weeks at a time, when I returned home, he picked me up from the airport, grabbed my shoulder, felt the bones sticking out, he said, "Kurus gilak dah kitak." And had my mother fly to Labuan regularly so I could finally regain my appetite. Needless to say, my father never approve of that boy ever again after that. But I was foolish and had to learn the hard way how parents are always right.

Above everything else, he taught me how to tell apart diamond from glass.

I'm closing in to 24 now and have witnessed a great deal of people all around me. And it makes me wonder how does my father manage three daughters. Satu dah lepas, sebab dah kahwin - and she was the true rebel, but now is happily married to a loving husband. I'm more of a rebel-in-hiding. 

But I'd like to think that I turned out alright.

Moderate. Not perfectly pious - but I learned my boundaries. I was once labelled materialistic by this girl but truth be told, no one can ever spoil me like my father does and I don't care much about anyone else's money anyway, except for mine. I know what I can afford and what I cannot. I am a little bit of everything but still more of in-between.

Semua yang baik (even if you think there aren't any) I give credit to my father. The bad ones? I aspire to be better.

My father means the world to me. To him, I owe so much more than just everything. Recently, he turned 56 and has finally retired after 31 years of service to SSB.

What led to this entry was, obviously, his birthday and retirement, (what could possibly be) the last Shell Family Day I attended the weekend before, the various people I have encountered up until today, the three day weekend when everyone was in town and the speeches at his farewell dinner with his bosses and colleagues. 

I am truly proud to have him as a father. Always have, always will.

Susahnya jaga anak perempuan.. only a father knows best. So thank you for not giving up on me, a work still in progress since 1987. Happiest birthday, pak. Semoga panjang umur, murah rezeki and hidup di berkati.

The Little Girl and The Giant.

During my niece's akikah last time, my brother in law's family came to Miri to join in the occasion, so did his nieces who are staying in UK.

The elder of the pair bonded with me easily because well.. I'm just awesome.

And cool.

Yeah.

"So, Alia. What do you like to do during your free time?" 

"I like to write!"

"That's good! I like to write too! What do you usually write about?"

"Oh just stories.. I've written a lot already."

Impressed with the 7 year old's interest, I probed some more. 

"So what's your proudest piece?" I asked, as I tried to think of what MY proudest piece is.

"There's this one about a little girl and her friend, giant."

"Giant as in the beast or is it his name?"

"Both." 

"I see. So what's their story?"

"Everyday the little girl and the giant would go into the forest.."

I continued doing the dishes.

"... and then they bathe in the river together!"

"HAH?!?" Whuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutttttttt. "Is that all they ever do??"

"Yeah! Because you see, it's a really special river!"

Special, uhuh! What the hell are the schools teaching the kids nowadays!

"Haha. Alia, tak muhrim lah. It's wrong to do that!" I teased.

"But it's only a story, Aunty Aysha!"

A message she left in my notes. Ah, so clever. And almost perfect enunciation. Order satu untuk future daughter, please? 

Matchmaking.

Mom and Aunty Bedah talking about Aunty's son who won't get married (for now) even though the girlfriend is more than ready to.

"Ya lah susah aku, Minah. Kesian aku Ija ya tunggu-tunggu, Pijal tok simok kahwin!" Said Aunty.

"Ya lah kan. Perempuan ya pun dah 28." Aok juak Mak tek.

"Dah bagus-bagus perempuan ya. Perange bagus, lemah lembut, bait dengan anak Pijal, kerja tetap.." Sambung Aunty.

Mak diam.

"Bagik Dzul jak Ija ya! Kelak aku pinang nya pake Dzul!" Kata nya!

"Maaaaaaaaak!" Sampuk aku. "Sukati jak mok minang gerek orang!"

Mak ketawa.

"Hmm. Kerja bank, bagus ya. Senang mok relocate." Sambung Mak lagik.

She's still considering! Ya Tuhan. Desperate mok bermenantu!

Momday.

Spent the whole day with mom today. We went crazy at the make up section at Watson and Chanel. But, all that cannot defeat my next finding - which I have bookmarked like crazy on my next to buy list.

Ladies and gents, I have met the love of my eyes in the form of Oakley Frogskins -

'Twas love at first try! Sumpah sik toleh other sunglasses dah! Frogskins darling, marry me. Cincin buka mulut and RM50, nah I kasi you! You nak mas kahwin berapa? NAH RM120! You nak hantaran apa?! Satu tempayan air mata anak dara? *Jambatan emas supaya you bisa menyeberangi hati I? Nah HAMEK. 

Melampau? Of course. It is that pretty. I'll try to survive another day without this particular Frogskins on my dresser. Dying.. as.. I... spp..peak...

Heh heh!

Anyway, do you notice how the elders are so much more adorable now that you're older? Some bits of conversation I had today.

"Patut sik kamek beli hair straightener?" I asked for mom's opinion.

This was, obviously, before I tried on the Frogskins.

"Jangan," she said. Pause. "Kelak kahwin, rosak rambut."

"Apa kah?" Jauhnya menyimpang!
"AIH BENA KATA MAK BAH."

Bising bah dalam Parkson! If you think I'm loud, wait til you meet my mom.

We had Sugarbun then. Was talking about a relative's marriage.

"Mas kahwin tok is very important!" Mom and her marriage speech. Don't even bother to stop her.

"RM 120 ya mesti ya!" Mas kahwin Sarawak. Then,

"Sebab ya harga dirik kitak bah!" 

Tersembur air. Mak gelak baru tersedar what she just said. RM 120!? Only!? This is an insult, I say!

Then we bumped into a relative, whom I never knew before this, and they were talking about erm breast firming cream?

Mom joked, "Dengar ya Sha, ada cream bah!"

I joked, "Sekda pake besarkan ka?"

Aunty jawab serious and penuh semangat, " ADA, ADA! Ada pake besarkan ****!"

Kuatnya Aunty cakap! Terus silang tangan. MALU. 

T_T

Visited mom's high school friend who just had a granddaughter.

Aunty shared a conversation she had with the in-law regarding the newborn's umbilical cord.

"Kalau orang sini, buat apa dengan tali pusat itu?" Tanya besan.

"Oh, ada orang tanam, ada orang bla bla bla, apa apa pun boleh." Jawab aunty.

"Oh.. Kalau kami lain." Cakap besan. "Kalau kami, tali pusat bagi bapak nya makan."

FEAR FACTOR 10.0. Berani lah torang laki kahwin orang dari siya!

Anyway, I'm beat. And what's this commotion I hear about Google+? 

* something I RT-ed from Jai that can still manage a chuckle out of me when I'm doing random house chores and suddenly get reminded of it.

Sunday, Schmunday.

Just a few hours short of Monday and you know it's time to get all emotional about having to go back to Bintulu. : (

Last Friday, I left work quite late seeing how I had to drive back to Miri alone. So I called the same people as usual just to inform them that I'll be starting my two hour journey back home. Both calls got cut off, so I assumed it was just the lousy signal at the highway. And so I drove and drove and not one person called me back!

Dah cebik. Dah lah I didn't get much sleep the night before. And I know it'll be dark halfway before I reach my destination. And that I was alone. And I hate being alone in the dark somewhere in the middle of nowhere. Okay more like, I'm terrified of the dark and the idea of being alone entrapped in total darkness reminds me of 30 Days of Night! And there are no street lights along the highway until Miri! Bloody hell.

After an hour, I set my ego aside and got myself ready to reveal my rajuk, checked my phone and realised it was my phone's problem! Switched it off then back on again and the second signal was available I got a call from my sister asking me in frantic where I was at the time.

"Bapak dah on the way to Bintulu carik kitak!"

WHOA. I FELT SO LOVED.

So, I sped and sped and arrived home even faster than I usually do.

Salam everyone and waited for my father to reached home from the mosque to salam him.

Saw him at the doorway and quickly reached for his hand. And all he could say was, "Hmm."

.. Er. Ohokay...

No "Why didn't you get off work earlier?"
or "Lain kali make sure phone ya switched on."
or "Next time just wait until Saturday morning to drive back to Miri." - which is exactly what I am going to do next time because (don't stone me, darling) driving back that day at that hour at that speed with Kelisa is very reckless, I just decided to overlook all those and drive as fast as I could.

My father and his Hmm's.

Today, 48 hours after the incident, he called me outside. 

"Apahal pak?"

"Kitak mbak Ford esok. Don't use Kelisa anymore."

Heh heh. There it is! : )

Also I have a new watch. My cheapo one broke on Friday so I was without a watch the whole day of Saturday. Walked in the watch store today, pointed at the model that I want, had two options - one with white numberings, the other with yellow numberings and my father told the salesperson, "Black and white is more classique. She's not a kid anymore."

Ya hear that! I'm not a kid anymore!

I'm so happy but somehow that, coming from my father, worries me. 

Ah well. I GOTS A NEW WATCH. 

And you know how watches tell other people a bit about the person? I was discussing about mine and what it would say about me. Would it say that I'm materialistic? Because I'm not. 

He said, "Nah. I'd keep it as 'cool as fuck'."

YEARGHH. I GOTS A NEW WATCH.

OK I shut up now.

Salam Aidilfitri.

'Tis the last day of Ramadhan! What have you achieved this year?

For me, this year was my first year of fasting in Bintulu. DON'T let me start on Bintulu. Please. Not that bigga deal if you consider how I was always away on Ramadhan since 2005. First it was Labuan (gag), then it was KL and now Bintulu. I guess Labuan wins the Worst Place to be Fasting In category. KL has the most atrociously awful traffic jam during this time of the year and Bintulu? Can't say anything much because it's... Bintulu? And that's not a good thing.

Whatever it is, Miri wins, hands down. Though my Ramadhan has never been the same without the famous abang who sells Murtabak Jakarta! Where has he gone off to? It has been.. what? Four years since I last have me some of those murtabak??

ABANG, BALIK LAH MALAYSIA. T_T

I swear on my flight tickets to KL this October, I will get to eat Murtabak Jakarta again before I die. Even at the cost of going there myself! *stalks AirAsia website*

I guess Bintulu is at least good for one thing, I get to do tarawikh at the mosque more than I've ever done so in KL or Labuan because I have Uncle with me. So, it's nice to join in the kampung people. Even if they sometimes stare because I was always alone, and obviously am not from around there. Or maybe because I just dazzle in my telekung.

.

..

...

But lemme tell you something! I am sick of people in coveralls being everywhere! And they are literally EVERYWHERE. On my way to work, I see these people walking along the road, or waiting for the bus. In the office, when that one contractor comes in to fix things. At the site, well that I understand because they have to. At the gas station, well they gotta fill up their tanks too. At pasar Ramadhan, in flocks, I swear! E-ve-ry-where.

There are so many things I wish out of Bintulu but I guess I just have to settle with things to be grateful of.

Last Friday, I was cruising from the office on my way to town, which, mind you, takes almost an hour to and fro, with earphones blaring off playlist from my iPhone, when I passed by this young lady carrying two luggage bags, with her one hand holding a child.

They were walking alongside the highway and it was murderously hot outside. See, ever since my first week in Bintulu I've been wanting to let someone hitch a ride with me but I never came to it because..

I was always in a rush.

It's not safe to just let strangers in your car, I can hear Ahmad in the background, "Nurul, jaga diri elok-elok tau." and trust me, he says that almost everyday.

The highway from our site office to nearby housing area is not that near, so (God forbid) if anything were to happen..

But that day, it was different. There were a lot of cars on the road because everyone was rushing to go somewhere before they go back for holiday. I really wanted to help but I hesitated at first but bad conscience over responsibility overpowered me. So I made a U-turn up ahead and looked for the lady. Saw her, made another U-turn and stopped by the road side.

"Kakak? Mau pergi mana?"

"Stesen bas.."

"Masuk lah kereta, kita sama-sama pergi. Kamek pun on the way."

She looked like she just showered in her own sweat. She got in the car with her two bags and her daughter, who must not have been a year older than 5? 6? And so we started chatting.

"Mau balik sine?" I spoke in both Sarawak dialect and a little bit of Bahasa itself, because I didn't know whether she was Iban or Indonesian. From our conversation later on, I found out she's the former.

"Miri.. Sudah lama tidak balik." She spoke softly. She seemed friendly, Good! I thought.

"Oh! Kamek pun orang Miri. Berapa lama sudah kakak sik balik?" I asked.

"Dua tahun.. Ya lah, mok tengok bajet kan." She said, her smile never left her lips.

And here you have me, driving back every weekend because RM50 for full tank is dispensable.

We got on more personal topics, how long has she stayed in Bintulu. How long have I been in Bintulu. Her father's kampung, mother's kampung, her kids. Her husband and former husband.

During some parts of our conversation, especially when she shared about her ex husband and why the marriage broke up, her voice was trembling.

Aku sedih. :'(

Ya Allah, protect all the women out there including myself from abusive husbands, I thought to myself.

If someone who's been through so much like her struggled with that type of men, apa lagi someone semanja aku, who has never even been hit or threatened with words by my own father.

We ventured into new topics after, her kampung in Niah and how there's no water and they take their showers in the river at the plantation and I was even more pressed with guilt. I see rivers being polluted everyday by the contractors and what do I do? Take a picture of it, make a report and instruct the contractors to do something about it - which is always too late for any action, anyway.

We reached the bus station, I helped her carry her things out of the car and she suddenly held out RM10 for me, "Untuk tambang kereta, dik."

Aku sedih lagi. What's RM10 for me?

"Tidak apa kak, kamek pun on the way jugak. Bagus-bagus okay?" I said, slipping in something.

"Terima kasih," She said gratefully.

And that alone made my whole week.

* * *

Since all of us are here (me from Bintulu, my baby sister from Kuching and my brother from KL), my father decided to break our fast at the hotel. Because he misses us! Well, he wouldn't say it. Pfft. But I know that man good enough that he does not need to say a word.

Looking all animated, telling a story about something.

My brother, my baby sister (who just cut her hair after being coerced to by yours truly) and my father who looked away when he saw me holding up my phone. Ecececeh!

Since it's my brother in law's turn to celebrate the first day of Raya at his kampung in Kedah, my sister and my niece will not be here for Raya until only the 5th day. I'm sharing this information because it's vital to the next part of my story.

Ayra, my niece, is my parents' first grandchild. My mother took care of her when she was here. My mother is lonely. My mother wants another grandchild so if Ayra can't celebrate Raya here at least she'll have the other grandchild to celebrate with. And then sitting at the same table, you have us - my 30 year old brother who's single, 23 year old me who just started working this year and my 19 year old sister. GO!

"Dzul, kahwin lagik kau Dzul."

Abang senyap. "Mmm."

"Okay? Mak mbak kau pergi Bandung cari bini, okay?"

"Mmm." Abang makan salad.

Because abang was not responsive, my mother turned to her daughter sitting next to her - me.

"Kitak kahwin bila, Sha?"

"Sekda duit," I said.

"Oh sikpa, mak belanja! Mak belanja! Bertunang jak dolok!"

"Mmm."

When two of her most probable children to get married soon both refused to respond to her pleading, she turned to her youngest.

"Baby.." And before she could say anything else, the whole table roared with laughter! Even my father struggled to contain his!

My mother is really desperate for more grandchildren, she even started planning for 2013, when none of her other kids are even married yet!

As for me? I have a few personal goals to achieve before I can even start on that. So, until then, Mak, minta maaf zahir dan batin!

***

Yesterday, I woke up really early. How early? 9.30 AM early! Suck on that!

Okay, don't.

Since my hair has been devoid of any contact with brushes for the past month, I thought it's high time for me to pamper it a little bit what with all the sun it has been exposed to day in and day out. So I turned to Bob.

Bob is a shemale. She (he?) is nice. She (he??) is chatty so it's always a fun trip when I go to Bob's hair salon. Bob has a really purdy Persian cat as seen in the picture below -

I forgot its name. But that's beside the point of this story.

Don't mind the bare face. It was 9.30 in the morning, hokay! On a Sunday! Sheesh.

Before I had the chance to do my hair, my mother stopped by the hair salon to persuade me to get the shot for prevention against cervical cancer after my hair treatment.

"But I don't want!" I protested.

"Sakit! Hari ya kamek kenak inject ya, keluar darah!" My baby sis chimed in, whose life is sworn to make it even more difficult for me.

"NOOOOOOOOO!!" I cried out.

"And since this is your first kan Kakak, you'll have another two shots to go!" She added.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

My shout reverberated through the room, I swear the glass of water on the table shook and almost spilled on the table. Wait, I don't swear. I am just trying to describe how loud I was.

VERY to the power of 10.

I don't like needles, NAY, I am terrified of needles. The thought of that thing being near me drives my heart up multiple notches. My heartbeat would accelerate so much, my tear duct would suddenly start producing this.. this thing you human call tear.

I am no human, I am an Ice Princess. I feel no emotion.

After learning that I cannot escape the needle. Ice Princess cebik. :-(

But after much wheedling (I'm so good) I made my mother believe that I'll go and get the shot the day after, instead (which was today but I didn't wake up for it teeheehee).

Helah berjaya. Happy sekejap, will deal with it tomorrow, I thought. And deal with it, I certainly did. Heh heh.

While waiting for the erm thing to finish erm producing steam from the top of my head? I was given a few magazines to read.

Of all magazines - URTV! Yes, tok lah best untuk gelak.

I browse through and laughed and laughed and laughed some more at the headlines displayed on every page.

Oh, poor Fasha. Tak rindu siapa? Tedah!

1. Edisi ekslusif dan terhad??

2. RM69 for a songkok!?

3. Tinggi 5 inci?!?!!

4. Nama songkok is NA'e'SYA?!???

5. ALL OF THE ABOVE!?!???!!! Bloody hell.

Ha ha makan katak!

Ah, I saved the best for last -

HOI!! Siapa ajak Ahmad ke ranjang ni!?! BERANI?! Nurul marah ni, marah!!

Teehee. You can only imagine how mad I looked like, with steams at the top of my head, laughing like no one's business! Ah, good day.

Selamat Hari Raya and Maaf Zahir Fatin. Oops, I mean batin!

Random Weekend.

01.

Today I went out alone. It was raining so it made me miss having my best of friends around even more! Also a certain someone and how we would run across Jalan Sultan Ismail in the rain and how I made him use the umbrella with hems so elaborate you'd think it belonged to a princess from the 15th century - but hey, that just goes without saying lah kan.

02.

Yesterday I had to wait for quite some time for my parents to get ready so I stood outside the house and took this picture of my feet and my cat, Ringo. He can't stop following me around, that twat. Nasib baik sayang! Kalau sik, dah lama buat satay!

I KID, I KID! Blrgh, just the thought of it makes me shudder!

(Hahaha! My father just opened my bedroom door and in all serious manner, said, "Tidur dengan Kak Asha ya." He was talking to the cats! Isn't he just adorable?! SAY YES OR I SUMPIT!)

03.

How I found Iman this morning. When I say morning, I mean noon. When I say noon, I mean afternoon.

Cut me some slack, it's the weekend! And I don't get to sleep in covered by heavily strewn comforters and 10,000 pillows when I'm in Bintulu!

So THERE.

04.

Self-explanatory.... but I'm still going to tell you what happened!

So my mother and I went out last night and to our horror, the traffic heading out of the car park area of the mall was moving at a frustrating snail-on-a-crutch like pace we just HAD to start talking about Coca Cola. We mmh-ed and ahh-ed at the thought of quenching our thirst with probably one of the best beverage ever invented (thank you Colonel Cola!).

After we finally escaped the whole debacle, we quickly rushed to the nearest petrol station. And I quickly rushed to the counter, "Kak, Coke duak!" After that, I quickly paid RM3. And I quickly returned back to the car. As I quickly did so, I quickly opened one can, while my other hand juggled with the other one.

And so you know how the story ends - me with a stained t-shirt and a nagging mom.

And so we live happily ever after.

The end!

Ayra sayang!

Some months ago, before my niece was born, my sister asked me for suggestions on what to name her baby.

I gave a few ideas -

"Kalsum!" Classic, I thought. Don't ask. I don't know what I was thinking.

"Hish, kelak orang tunggah anak aku Som Som Ayam!" She argued.

"Maryam!" I suggested.

"Kelak orang kampung tunggah nya 'Yammmmmm, oh Yammm!'" Like, what the hell!?

This went on for quite some time. I pushed for Maryam the most because I couldn't think of any other names that would be perfect for a baby girl... And of course, it's just in my nature to be stubborn. Biar lah!

Few months after, Ayra Nabilah was born. At first it was just Ayra, but my brother in law wanted a name with a beautiful meaning so they added Nabilah.

Naturally, some people were a bit inquisitive when they see Ayra for the first time because my sister is very fair. In fact, she is the fairest among us siblings! Ayra, on the other hand, is not.

"Kenak nya gel.. oh!" Their unfinished questions when they finally realised Ayra takes after her father's darker skin tone.

Nak di jadikan cerita... While I was doing... something in the... something (seriously can't remember), I overheard my mother playing with Ayra in the TV room.

"Ayraaaaa.." She called out as Ayra replied with a baby's blank stare and their usual pouty lips.

"Ayraaaa..." She called out again, and continued with, "Ayra Nabiiilemmmmmm..."

If I was drinking, I would've choked on my drink. If I was standing, I would've rolled on the floor laughing. If I was.... Okay you get my drift! I really can't remember what the hell I was up to BUT the point is! - My sister tried so bloody hard to pick a name that no one could bully her daughter with and she picked Nabilah. We found a loophole! Nabilem!

Wahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

*wipes tear* Sigh.

To those who do not understand - my mother is a Melanau. 'Bilem' is Melanau for Black or Dark.

The other night, on the phone with Ahmad, I retold this incident and explained to him from A to Z (maybe even continued back to A then to Z again).

"Sebab Abang Daus kan gelap!" I laughed.

"Eh, hari tu jumpa.. Takde lah dia gelap pun," He claimed.

"Ha ah! I lupa. Korang kan.. sekulit," I said.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAR.

Bilem, bilem pun, Chik Cha sayang juak. ;-)

The Man.

Bapak, I love you more than world itself.

Sure, we never say it out loud to each other before. Sure, the last time we hugged was when I was still in diapers and the closest to embrace we ever had after that was whenever we salam on the first day of Raya Aidil Fitri when I lean in to kiss your forehead, a custom in Sarawak. Sure, the closest to 'I love you' I've ever gotten from you was, "Take care, jangan lupa semayang," after each phone call.

I guess among the many lessons you taught me in life is to not say those three words in vain. I never have and I don't plan to start anytime soon.

So -

Bapak, I love you. Happy Father's Day.

P.s. Jangan hantar kamek ke Kimanis okay?